Ubiquitous Reciprocal Affinity

From: <karlwinthrop@gmail.com>
Date: Wed, Aug 17, 2011 at 8:42 AM
Subject: SMS with {{Ex-landlord}}
To: {{Ex-landlord}} <##SMS##Hidden##@unknown.email>
Just thought I’d say; you running into me at 19 was kinda fun.
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From: {{Ex-landlord}} <##SMS##Hidden##@unknown.email>
Date: Wed, Aug 17, 2011 at 9:57 AM
Subject: SMS with {{Ex-landlord}}
To: karlwinthrop@gmail.com
Lol, it is a small world!
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From: {{Ex-landlord}} <##SMS##Hidden##@unknown.email>
Date: Wed, Aug 17, 2011 at 9:57 AM
Subject: SMS with {{Ex-landlord}}
To: karlwinthrop@gmail.com
But fun
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From: <karlwinthrop@gmail.com>
Date: Wed, Aug 24, 2011 at 8:53 AM
Subject: SMS with {{Ex-landlord}}
To: {{Ex-landlord}} <##SMS##Hidden##@unknown.email>
What are your plans for Friday? When is a good time for me to stop by for the keys?
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From: {{Ex-landlord}} <##SMS##Hidden##@unknown.email>
Date: Wed, Aug 24, 2011 at 8:57 AM
Subject: SMS with {{Ex-landlord}}
To: karlwinthrop@gmail.com
Friday works ok.  I get home around 615p or so, I bike so it takes a bit longer.  I can always txt u when I get home.
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From: {{Ex-landlord}} <##SMS##Hidden##@unknown.email>
Date: Fri, Sep 2, 2011 at 8:27 PM
Subject: SMS with {{Ex-landlord}}
To: karlwinthrop@gmail.com
Karl, I don’t think you should get too comfortable. I warned you my peeve is running utilities with the windows open. It’s also 74 degrees out, it’s really not necessary to run it anyway. Let’s make an exit plan for the end of the month.
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From: <karlwinthrop@gmail.com>
Date: Fri, Sep 2, 2011 at 11:13 PM
Subject: SMS with {{Ex-landlord}}
To: {{Ex-landlord}} <##SMS##Hidden##@unknown.email>
Still kinda in shock. I’d be willing to contribute toward the extra utilities I used today. This is not typical for me and I’d really like to show that I’m a very responsible person. Had very much been looking forward to living with you, Steve, Bax & Max. Can you set aside time to chat on Sunday Eve?

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From: {{Ex-landlord}} <##SMS##Hidden##@unknown.email>
Date: Sat, Sep 3, 2011 at 8:21 AM
Subject: SMS with {{Ex-landlord}}
To: karlwinthrop@gmail.com
It’s unfortunate you weren’t unable to demonstrate how responsible you claim to be.  Actions speak louder than words. your actions were disrespectful and careless. This is not the kind of room-mate I’m looking for.
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From: <karlwinthrop@gmail.com>
Date: Thu, Sep 8, 2011 at 4:26 PM
Subject: SMS with {{Ex-landlord}}
To: {{Ex-landlord}} <##SMS##Hidden##@unknown.email>
FYI: I’ve hired movers to come get the majority of my things Saturday morning (just got moved up due to a cancelation). The search for a new operational base is underway but I can’t plan to be out earlier than Sept 30, although that may happen. I’m late at the store tonight but I will be there Friday night to get things reorganized from what little unpacking I did. I’ll keep you updated as things occur.

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From: {{Ex-landlord}} <##SMS##Hidden##@unknown.email>
Date: Thu, Sep 8, 2011 at 5:51 PM
Subject: SMS with {{Ex-landlord}}
To: karlwinthrop@gmail.com
Karl, I’m not sure it’s a good decision to let you stay, but I’m willing to reconsider.  Don’t make me sorry if you decide to stay.

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From: <karlwinthrop@gmail.com>
Date: Sat, Sep 10, 2011 at 10:34 AM
Subject: SMS with {{Ex-landlord}}
To: {{Ex-landlord}} <##SMS##Hidden##@unknown.email>
Thanks for keeping the pups under control while the.movers were there. FYI: the wardrobe doors are being bought next week, and should be picked up Monday or Wednesday. Never meant to be such a hassle.

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From: <karlwinthrop@gmail.com>
Date: Wed, Sep 28, 2011 at 3:11 PM
Subject: SMS with {{Ex-landlord}}
To: {{Ex-landlord}} <##SMS##Hidden##@unknown.email>
Will you be around Friday eve? I’d like to give back the key and get the deposit back. Also please confirm that you’ve discontinued the bank debit.

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From: {{Ex-landlord}} <##SMS##Hidden##@unknown.email>
Date: Wed, Sep 28, 2011 at 3:19 PM
Subject: SMS with {{Ex-landlord}}
To: karlwinthrop@gmail.com
I won’t be here Friday eve.  What wardrobe doors?
Bank account deduction has been discontinued.

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From: {{Ex-landlord}} <##SMS##Hidden##@unknown.email>
Date: Wed, Sep 28, 2011 at 3:21 PM
Subject: SMS with {{Ex-landlord}}
To: karlwinthrop@gmail.com
Lock door put keys in mail slot.

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From: {{Ex-landlord}} <##SMS##Hidden##@unknown.email>
Date: Wed, Sep 28, 2011 at 3:28 PM
Subject: SMS with {{Ex-landlord}}
To: karlwinthrop@gmail.com
And leave your forwarding address.

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From: <karlwinthrop@gmail.com>
Date: Wed, Sep 28, 2011 at 3:44 PM
Subject: SMS with {{Ex-landlord}}
To: {{Ex-landlord}} <##SMS##Hidden##@unknown.email>
Are you available Thursday eve or Saturday afternoon? I saw that the previous occupant was still requesting return of his deposit more than 6 weeks after his departure. I would like to resolve this more quickly.  The doors that had been in the garage were purchaed and picked up last week.

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From: {{Ex-landlord}} <##SMS##Hidden##@unknown.email>
Date: Wed, Sep 28, 2011 at 3:51 PM
Subject: SMS with {{Ex-landlord}}
To: karlwinthrop@gmail.com
Are you planning to put the furniture back the way it was?

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From: <karlwinthrop@gmail.com>
Date: Wed, Sep 28, 2011 at 3:53 PM
Subject: SMS with {{Ex-landlord}}
To: {{Ex-landlord}} <##SMS##Hidden##@unknown.email>
If you do not feel the reconfiguration was an improvement, I can do so.

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From: {{Ex-landlord}} <##SMS##Hidden##@unknown.email>
Date: Wed, Sep 28, 2011 at 3:54 PM
Subject: SMS with {{Ex-landlord}}
To: karlwinthrop@gmail.com
Also, the trash is outside the garage in the back not the container in the garage.  No, it wasn’t an improvement

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From: {{Ex-landlord}} <##SMS##Hidden##@unknown.email>
Date: Fri, Sep 30, 2011 at 9:30 PM
Subject: SMS with {{Ex-landlord}}
To: karlwinthrop@gmail.com
Keys have not yet been returned and the bedroom furniture is not back in place.

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From: <karlwinthrop@gmail.com>
Date: Fri, Sep 30, 2011 at 9:50 PM
Subject: SMS with {{Ex-landlord}}
To: {{Ex-landlord}} <##SMS##Hidden##@unknown.email>
You said you weren’t available to meet. I made other plans. Are you available tomorrow afternoon?

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From: {{Ex-landlord}} <##SMS##Hidden##@unknown.email>
Date: Fri, Sep 30, 2011 at 10:05 PM
Subject: SMS with {{Ex-landlord}}
To: karlwinthrop@gmail.com
You won’t get your deposit back until the room is returned along with keys.

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From: {{Ex-landlord}} <##SMS##Hidden##@unknown.email>
Date: Fri, Sep 30, 2011 at 10:05 PM
Subject: SMS with {{Ex-landlord}}
To: karlwinthrop@gmail.com
Your last day is today with rightful entry. You didn’t pay rent for Oct.

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From: {{Ex-landlord}} <##SMS##Hidden##@unknown.email>
Date: Fri, Sep 30, 2011 at 10:07 PM
Subject: SMS with {{Ex-landlord}}
To: karlwinthrop@gmail.com
If u want your deposit back you aren’t going about it very well.

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From: <karlwinthrop@gmail.com>
Date: Sun, Oct 2, 2011 at 5:33 PM
Subject: SMS with {{Ex-landlord}}
To: {{Ex-landlord}} <##SMS##Hidden##@unknown.email>
Let me know if you will be available, Tuesday or Wednesday eve. My friend and I can stop by to rearrange the room. Or if you prefer, I can try to coordinate with Steve to be home for the reset; and we can make later arrangements for the key/deposit exchange.

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From: {{Ex-landlord}} <##SMS##Hidden##@unknown.email>
Date: Sun, Oct 2, 2011 at 5:54 PM
Subject: SMS with {{Ex-landlord}}
To: karlwinthrop@gmail.com
Karl, I told you the keys need to be returned before the end of the month that you paid for.  The house will get rekeyed at a cost of $150 and I will have to pay movers to put the furniture back the way it was. This comes out of your deposit.  You don’t have the option to come back and it’s not required t
u moved out.

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From: <karlwinthrop@gmail.com>
Date: Sun, Oct 2, 2011 at 6:55 PM
Subject: SMS with {{Ex-landlord}}
To: {{Ex-landlord}} <##SMS##Hidden##@unknown.email>
Really? Is room configuration a reasonable part of a rental agreement? Or my request that you be present to assure things are placed to your liking? And also my request to meet in person to return the key? Are any of these things outside the realm of common courtesy?  Am I to infer that you refuse to meet me? If I am misunderstanding you, please clarify your position. Do things really have to continue like this?

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From: {{Ex-landlord}} <##SMS##Hidden##@unknown.email>
Date: Sun, Oct 2, 2011 at 10:26 PM
Subject: SMS with {{Ex-landlord}}
To: karlwinthrop@gmail.com
Karl, it’s very simple as I told you earlier. 1) return your keys., 2) return the room to it’s configuration. This is reasonable since the furniture you moved is extremely heavy and you didn’t have the courtesy to ask if it was ok to move it and now expect others to correct this on your behalf. This is irresponsible (again), to think that this is ok and that you seem to not think it’s your responsibility.  This is why you cant live here. 3). I need your forwarding address to return your deposit.  We don’t need to meet since I already told you this.  YOU instead decided to not do any of these things and now are troubled by the consequence.

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From: Karl Winthrop <karlwinthrop@gmail.com>
Date: Sun, Oct 2, 2011 at 11:47 PM
Subject: Re: SMS with {{Ex-landlord}}
To: {{Ex-landlord}} <##SMS##Hidden##@unknown.email>
I have returned the key. I request that you return the enterity if my deposit by Saturday October 8th or I shall file legal action for its return.

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From: {{Ex-landlord}}
Date: Mon, Oct 3, 2011 at 12:22 AM
Subject: Re: SMS with {{Ex-landlord}}
To: Karl Winthrop <karlwinthrop@gmail.com>
Karl, please do, I would welcome the opportunity to talk with your attorney.

As I stated earlier, the furniture is extremely heavy and you moved it with out permission and apparently consideration that you would have to put it back.  The original configuration is preferred and it is not unreasonable to expect the room to be returned in the same condition you found it. Extra effort beyond what would be considered “normal” is required.  That furniture is very heavy and not appropriate in its current location. You were renting a furnished bedroom.

You were advised of all this prior to your departure.  Instead you chose not to. It is irresponsible although not surprising I guess, to think you would be due a full refund.  I will return your deposit once I know the cost to hire someone to return the furniture to its original position as one person can not move the furniture.  You knew this when you and your accomplice moved it to it’s current location.

I’m sorry that you are unable to be responsible enough to take ownership for your actions.  As I guessed shortly after you moved in you are not the kind of responsible room-mate that I would care to live with, and much to my disappointment you proved me right.

Sincerely,
Sent from an iPhone
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From: Karl Winthrop <karlwinthrop@gmail.com>
Date: Wed, Aug 24, 2011 at 8:53 AM
Subject: SMS with {{Ex-landlord}}
To: {{Ex-landlord}} ##SMS##Hidden##@unknown.email
Some things that I believe you have overlooked in your evaluation of the situation: 1)  On the day I viewed the room, I indicated that I would be bringing some of my own furniture, and wondered if that would be a problem. Your response was that if there were any items that I did not need in the room they could be moved for storage to the basement. I specifically mentioned that the closet organizer would not be necessary. 2) On the Friday when I completed the move of my boxed items I inquired about where you would like the antique radio (that was in the room) moved to should I not be able to include it in the reconfiguration of the room. Your response was that it could be stored in the basement. And there was no indication that shifting the configuration was in any way an issue.  3) I moved “heavy furniture items” with the help of my brother with minimal effort and in a short amount of time.  4)  The closet organizer that I had been temporarily removed from the room was returned prior to my departure.  5) Prior to my departure I made it clear that I am willing to rearrange the furniture at a time convenient to your presence.  I have repeatedly provided my availability and continue to be willing at a mutually agreed upon time to place the furniture in a configuration of your direction.

After a few days in India I have what I think is enough information to form a first impression.  I hope these change over the course of these weeks here, but I want to get them down so I can  compare and contrast.

I suspect that these observations could apply to any of the rapidly-industrializing/post-consumerism-attempting economies of the world (BRIC, and the like) but there will be Indian specifics that will undoubtedly creep in. And my scope of view will likely be a bit limited due to the short leash I’ll be on given that I’m here to work.

I arrived at the Delhi in the dark but even as the driver sent to pick us up there were signs that the new wealth was not accruing to everybody evenly. There were people at the air port that wanted to help me with my bags for a small fee, but as I only had two small rollers there wasn’t much need — still they kept calling out, asking  if they could help me.

There were guards with rifles as we left the airport, and as we arrived at the gated residence complex (called Central Park — I assume that because once phase II is complete there will be gardens between the two sets of apartment towers)
and an unarmed desk clerk at the building entrance. With the number of security personnel you would think that the buildings were Trump-elaborate monstrosities of excess, but the furnishings were right out on a Ikea catalog (although not actually from the Swedish housewares giant, the style and construction techniques are definitely stolen from them) as I had predicted from looking at the photographs.

The one thing I hadn’t though through after looking at the photos was the house-man who lives here and does the cooking/cleaning/laundry for the people that are visiting the company’s India division. I’m not sure what time away from the apt he is afforded, nor his salary, but I have seen others like him walking around the complex, and I assume that a good portion of occupants have “domestics” (the promotional web-site for Phase 2 indicates that all units will have servant’s rooms) to help with all those things that I hate doing for myself.

With labor as cheap as it likely is - and most definitely is by comparison to the US — there is no shortage of hands to prepare food, do laundry and make my bed when I’m away. That’s just the thing that will likely be hardest the thing to get acustomed to, especially for a “bleeding heart liberal” like myself — my first any only twinge of rich-guilt. It comes as I’m riding down the highways and see the throngs of children, disfigured women and old men wandering alongside all the mini-vans, rickshaws and motorcycles. The last of those often carrying three people on it’s two wheels.

Tomorrow starts my work at the “night-office” as it’s affectionately known. I will  have more  after that. Till then I leave you with a picture of my morning view.

In last months GQ an essay expounding on the dangers of over-friending people from various parts of ones life that before this brave new age of constant connecteness would have been religated to very specific un-mixing domains. Very rarely would work mix with political activism, friend from the local bar would not see you in the same way that great-aunt Margaret did, and it would be impossible for that 3rd grade bully to contact you out of the blue and want to make it up to you.

Bit with the invention the “electronic friendship generator” the once remote possibilities have been born into a world not quite ready for the self-awareness that always-on water cooler discussions. The essay was mainly dealing with people from long gone eras of ones life coming back to haunt an interminable highschool reunion. My haunting isn’t from quite that far back but like that other author I’m struggling to decide what amount of contact I want to have with this person from my past

Some years ago my sister got married; I wasn’t all that impressed with the guy (can’t say that anyone really liked him). As a group my family tolerated him and made nice with his rather tragic family. The one bright spot was my sister’s new step-daughter who was very happy to have all the attention my mom and her new aunties lavished upon her. She also gave me a nickname - one that I hope my other nephews and nieces will pick up when they’re old enough. I did really like being an uncle. She had a great sense of humor and really lived being a big sister. I had visions of my extended family being a needed stabalizing force in her life that would allow her to grow into the beautiful young-woman that everyone saw as her potential. I also hoped that I/we could shepherd her through the Impending onslaught of teen angst.

Saddly none of those hopes came to pass. Shortly after my nephew was born, his father did some horendous things and was sent to prison. The marriage ended and it was decided that she would live with her mother. It was a difficult time for everyone, and I suspect that there was not nearly enough time to prepare emotionaly for the change. (Her mother seemed like a grounded person but no having lived together for many years, the parent child relationship was in need of an overhaul.) I only saw her a few times after the house was sold.

There was some discussion and disagreement as to what level of contact was appropriate after the divorce. Stemming from the nature of his crimes, it was difficult to disentangle wanting to be sympathetic to her from wanting to never see her father again. For a while my sister continued to act as a girlscout leader for the troop she belonged to, but gradually she fell away from the troop.

Every so often news would filter to my sister — she and the mom have a few of the same friends — and it was nice to hear how her life was going. A sort of 4 degrees of gossip that let me know she was OK and that she was moving well through life. It would be nice to be assured that the damage wrought by her father was repairable, and that nothing but the normal teenager drama was happening.

Lately though it seems she has been having a bit more than the normal teenage problems, and I’m wondering if it would be appropriate to accept her recent friend request. And like just after the divorce I’m wondering if the possibilities for a positive impact out weigh the connection to a low life scum bag.

I just had a chance to listen to a pre-christmas This American Life episode. And like Sedaris’ Santaland Diarys this story gets behind the holiday that so many of us love (and some of us are just annoyed by). 

http://www.thislife.org/Radio_Episode.aspx?sched=1276

The hilarity begins about minuet 24. And don’t forget to tip your host on the way out.