The title of the post says it as suscint as possible. But I can’t put a whole post of just that one sentance over and over again. Those of you who are single will likely be aware of the emotions - and those of you in relationships are likely recollecting the “bad old days” before happiness presented itself.

Right now I’m “between relationships” and by relationship I mean a period of monogomus dating. I did once reach a stage where I lived with a significant other, but that was long ago and illconsidered. Most of my “relationships” since then have lasted 18 to 24 months aproximately the gestational period of an Elephant calf. Metaphorically I guess that implies a lot of miscarriages (or just that the “where’s this going” question takes that much time to become big enough to force acknowledgement). The elephant in the room indeed.

When they end I usually take a period to mourn, usually llasting about a week for each month that the relationship lasted. By that token I was “over ” the last BF by the time my brother got married last year. Since then I’ve had a lot of first dates, a smatterin of seconds and a grAnd total of 4 third dates. So much for the sucess rate of Match dot Com.

Every time I get the “I’m really busy” brush off I wonder what it was that put them off. Was it my busy schedule? Was it my nerdiness? Was it the fact that I’m always running late? And easily distracted? I never get an answer like that - which would be easier to understand. Mostly it’s the cliché ” not you, it’s me”, or the even more generic “just not working”.

This gives me no direction for improvement. Which could at least a way to channel the anger at getting dumped. I could get to the gym more often, spend more time cleaning my apt ( which usually needs it, but I’m not usually motivated unless I have an impression to make) or even discontinuing the use of phrase X. (I’ve recently caught myself starting to say the useless tautology “It is what it is”, I thankfully stopped before I got through “Wha”.) I’m left strugging to come up with a blueprint for how to be a better boyfriend. So I’m looking for all the advice I can get.

All suggestions welcome. All criticisms are acceptable. Let the commenting begin!

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